13 Weeks Ago: Lessons, Rules, Relationships

13 weeks ago our Little Lady made her grand entrance into our world. She is growing far too fast. She, in combination with the boys, is a sharp reminder of how fast time passes. My baby boy is a month away from his 6th birthday, and Little Lady is already 1/4 of a year old.

This makes my heart sad some days.

I’ve been getting so wrapped up in teaching these kids that I’m wearing myself out. I’m looking for a lesson in everything and constantly trying to do good enough as a mom. I am plagued by this driving force of the “be good enough” and it is exhausting.

This checklist is running in my head all of the time, it is this constant nagging of whether or not I’m teaching them enough. The things I ask myself: Am I teaching them enough history? Are they learning enough math? Respect? Obedience? Responsibility? Discipline? Self care? Are they learning about God? Learning scripture? Praying enough?

Rules, rules, rules. I’m taking my own passion for parenting out of the mix by trying to come up with the perfect mix.

These are good questions, and living life together is the best instructor. Them watching me, relating with me, growing up in an environment full of opportunities for learning, is great. But when it turns into a check list that drains Mom of all her energy, things are a bit “off”.

At LifeChurch.tv, Pastor Craig said “Rules without relationship leads to rebellion.” Now, this didn’t sink in for almost a week. I kind of brushed it off, really. Yet, I’m sitting here soaking in how true it is.

The most important thing I can impart to these kids is my support, love and relationship. Sure, I think some structure is good for all of us. But if I can help them grasp that God loves them and wants to know them personally, by having and sharing my own relationship with Him, then that will take them further in life than any lesson I can teach.

If I can also communicate openly with them, answering most of their questions, listening to their dreams and desires and thoughts, and sharing my own with them, I will build a healthy relationship with them. And if they are close to God, and have a healthy relationship with me, then they will be prepared to have healthy relationships with the people they encounter throughout life.

I think, instead of stressing myself out about every single moment being a teaching moment, I’ll cuddle them a little closer, listen a little more, and worry a little less. And I’ll pray a little more, because God doesn’t expect us to do this on our own.

Have you ever worried yourself over whether or not your making the most of the teaching moments?