He Smells Like a Stripper


My sweet baby boy is suffering with a dry skin issue. We’re not talking about a little “ashy” look from time to time. This boy is scaly like a lizard, peeling all over, and dry. I thought that delaying his newborn bath would prevent this as it did with our daughter, but I was wrong. His bath was delayed, and he still dried out. And he’s stayed that way for 3 months now.

The lovely ladies at our midwife clinic said to try some coconut oil.

But here’s the thing, I have learned that I am a skeptic first. Always. Whether western medicine or natural remedies. Madness, I say. It is all madness.

Sure, I’ve heard that coconut oil does everything, fixes everything, can be used to cook, you can eat it, hair loves it, skin loves it, it’s the magic make a rash disappear, must have it on hand, oil. Heck, put it in your coffee. Good fats. Good fats. Makes bug bites stop stinging/itching etc. I’ve heard so often “put some CO on/in it,” that I decided I would hold off getting any – for nearly the last two years. I mean, can it really be that amazing?

I’m even more skeptical of baby lotion, so I bought the CO as recommended.

I’m in love with a small jar of hard white (brown flecks are normal) jar of cold-pressed, organic, all natural, never refined, totally raw and chemical free coconut oil.
(Sorry honey) I have it at home. I have it at work. I use it on my lips instead of chapstick now. I use it on my hands. I cover the dried out baby boy from head to toe once or twice a day.

After one of these coverings, my sweet husband picked up our little linebacker, took one whiff, and looked me square in the eyes, “He smells like a stripper.”

Well there you have it folks. Coconut oil may cure what ails you, but you’re going to smell like a stripper if you cover yourself in it.

(As for the dry rash, I see improvement with application, but am also working on some dietary changes because it seems to be persisting. If I miss a rub down, he’s still awfully dry.)

12 Weeks Ago: United

When we found out that the Little Lady was on her way to our family, I wondered endlessly about how the boys would react. Would they know we still love them? Would they feel replaced?

Would the “ours” baby cause strife among the blended siblings and us?

How would it go?

What would happen?

Well, we are only (already?) 12 weeks into this chapter, and it’s going well. I assumed that the 14 year old would be stand off-ish. Yet, he warmed up to the Little Lady immediately, and has hovered ever since. The little boys cannot even breathe on her without me hearing about it.

The 7 year old is about as indifferent now as he was when I was pregnant. He just flat doesn’t say that much about her. He holds her occasionally. He isn’t hostile about her being here, but past the first day or two of excitement, it seems like she can either stay or go, but it doesn’t matter to him one way or the other. (No, I’m really not being extreme, I think we could rehome the baby, and he would just be like “okay, can I go play?” Yes, this is odd to me.)

The 5 year old thinks she’s pretty cool. He has definitely tried to pick up some baby habits, because losing the baby status is hard. Yet, he loves to hold her and play with her and run to her when she whimpers. He talks to her and tells people about her quite proudly.

3 different reactions from 3 vastly different boys, all united by one sister. I love that she is the combination of all of us, and that in her own way, she drew us all closer together. She is the magical little link between her daddy and I, and between each of the brothers. It’s really cool if you ask me.

(I’m sure that when she is toddling around, getting into their things, and all I’m hearing is “MOOOOOM SHE’S TOUCHING MY STUFF” I’ll probably rethink how blissful and beautiful this seems. It’s midnight though, I’m delirious, and all feels right in my world.)


We’re Having a Baby!

Four little words that I will treasure forever. Four little words that encouraged me to be hopeful, reassured me when I had doubts, and made me smile when I was grumpy. Our baby is already here, and we are beyond blessed to have her in our life.

When we found out she was on her way; however, I was a little scared. I was scared of what people would think, of how life would change, of doing it alone. There were enough fears that I don’t know how to name them all. Part of the fear stemmed from believing that the cultural “norm” was if a couple wasn’t married, the dad was probably about to make a grand exit. Or a quiet, sneaky one. Whichever.

Baby Daddy didn’t go anywhere. He never mentioned going anywhere. I never caught him, with bags packed, sneaking out the door at night. In fact, I think I’m the only one who ever had a thought that involved him leaving. I am beyond thankful that he stayed, and that I am now his wife. (And yes, I have a horrible fear of abandonment. Like, its bad beyond words bad how afraid of it I am.)

In those first few days and weeks after we found out, we started this daily little thing of getting one another’s attention, and whispering, “We’re having a baby.” This little thing was soothing, comforting, and made it safe for me to be excited, to face anybody that judged us for not being married, and to trust that he wanted to be here as much as I wanted him to be here.

“We’re having a baby,” grew to include, with a giggle, “A pink baby.” Or some other reference of us having a baby girl. (After 4 boys, that was exciting news!) It may be silly, and it’s a small thing, but it made my day when my feet hurt and my back ached. It eased the fears and helped me open my eyes to Baby Daddy’s excitement. This silly thing gave me hope and encouraged me, and I will always remember the fun we had reminding each other that she was on her way.

What silly thing has your significant other done that encouraged you? Have you let them know that you were encouraged by it?